Get your own life first…

Something new I’m bringing to my blog is that on Sunday’s is I’m going to post a quote. Sometimes I’ll comment on the quote…other times I’ll just post a quote for people to ponder over. So to kick start this, and because it’s valentine’s Day…This quote is about relationships.

If you are not happy being single, you will never be happy in a relationship. Get your own life first, then share it.

I’ve spoken about this before, but it still is and always will be true. Too many people get into relationships just so they aren’t alone, and fair enough sometimes it can help. But a lot of the time that person just becomes too invested in the another person. So much so, that they lose themselves and become a shadow of what they used to be or even what they could be. They lose their potential a bit, the potential to be brilliant. In life we need time to ourselves, to explore and discover…so get your own life, then share it.

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Happy Being Alone

In the beginning in most cases we’re never alone. As babies, as toddlers, as children we aren’t alone. But then as soon as you become older, your left alone in the big bad world. Which is fine and nice but then after a while you begin to think about it. Are you happy being alone with your own company?

For some people this is quite easy, free at last in a sense. But for others it can prove to be hard. A few of my friends have gone from relationship to relationship and it makes me think, is it just because you don’t want to be alone? I mean I’ve been single for a while now, so yeah I can see the appeal of wanting to be with someone because your bored or yourself and want something different again. But then I can also see the other side of it.

For me when I first ‘fell in love’ that was everything. It’s was new, exciting…but to be completely honest I lost myself. I got so into the relationship that I didn’t know what it was like to just be me anymore. That was the hardest thing. Now I’m not saying I’m completely anti-relationship now because of it, but it makes you a bit more wiser I guess.

So overall I think what I’m trying to say is you need to be happy alone, so that you don’t lose yourself. I know everyone’s different mentally but for me that was something that happened, and it is hard to come back from it. But it’s a lesson to learn!

The best way to be happy with someone, is to be happy alone. That way the company will be a matter of choice…not a necessity.

Holiday…

Today’s challenge was ‘think of any word, type it into google and then write something inspired about the 11th image’.This image is shown above.

Like a lot of things in life, some words come with a set image or even stigma. The word holiday is no exception. When people mention a holiday the first thing that pops into your head is somewhere warm, sunny, relaxing with the sea out in front of you and a drink in hand. That’s why I don’t class Iceland as a holiday…more of an adventure, whenever someone brings it up. I’ve only been to Iceland this year, and with everyone posting photo’s of their holidays now…it sucks.

I want to go on holiday. Correction…I want to go on a warm holiday! I need sun! Sometimes I like to blame my eczema for needing a holiday because the vitamin D and the sea water is good for it…but really it’s just because I like to escape England and enjoy the warmth and freedom. Anyway…I’m off to book a holiday!!!

What I miss…

Like most university students I moved away from home. This was after I stayed at home and travelled for the first year, and then decided it wasn’t for me. But for the two years that I lived in Sheffield, I honestly loved it. I loved having my own space, with my own freedom to do whatever I wanted no matter what time it was. I mean don’t get me wrong, I did miss seeing my family everyday…but I had so much more independence. I can even say I enjoyed being able to do my own washing…how weird is that?

I even fell in love with Sheffield itself. It had so much to offer than my hometown. Better jobs, better atmosphere, better theatres, everything. In a way because I’ve returned home now, I yearn for this freedom I had never experienced before going to university. I’d love to move out again no matter where I moved to…but it’s a bit hard when you’re attempting to save for other things like travelling, not to mention having to fix a broken car. In some ways I feel like my life’s on hold a bit…but sacrifices must be made I guess.

Daily Blessings

Now I know this is intended as an insightful and possibly inspiring blog but I was stuck with what to write for this blog, and even which direction to go in. So like I do with everything else…I took to google to get some ideas. I then stumbled across an extremely ‘uplifting’ list of blessings we have in life. On this list was things like wisdom, protection, purpose, and free will…to which on this one I read it as ‘free wiFi‘ so in a freak turn of events I’m going to start off with that twist.

  1. Free WiFi – I know this is shallow in someway when we look around at the world at what we’ve been given and the life we have, but I am grateful for free WiFi. I mean firstly because I have a blog…I mean I can’t go a day without checking my stats to see what countries have looked at me. Another good reason for free WiFi is, if what I’m planning takes off (going travelling), I need wi-fi to be able to contact my family without spending money.
  2. Freedom – This ones a bit more profound. I am grateful for freedom. I’m grateful for the freedom to be able to do what I want, wear what I want, and be who I want. There’s so much freedom we have in this life that we don’t realise when compared to others…it’s crazy to think about it.
  3. Nature – It’s a beautiful world we have, and we waste it by being stuck inside doing pointless daily tasks. Theres so much to experience and learn, and it’s right outside our doors.
  4. Having a voice – Everyone has their own opinions, and they have a choice to voice it in a number of ways. Whether people listen or not, the chance of one person listening and it influencing them in some way is massive. So be brave, and maybe even take a stand.
  5. Having support – there’s a lot that happens in life, but even if there’s only one person to offer support it’s normally gratefully accepted. Especially through tough times and even if it’s by doing the smallest act of kindness…it goes a long way…

Be You!

“Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you!” – Dr Seuss

In times of difficulty when writing, I tend to go back to simpler means.This is one of the simplest quotes I’ve come across. However It’s also very important. It comes from a children’s book, and in my opinion this is the mind frame all children should have growing up.

Everyone is different. Different genders, races, religions, sexuality, backgrounds. Every little detail that builds up a person…makes a person who they are. So no matter what anyone thinks, you should never give up the right to be who you want to be. Which is easier said then done. Because in this life there are a lot of stigmas, and bad publicity which leads to bad opinions. For example with a lot of issues regarding terrorism in the news, certain narrow-minded people begin to think and even spread that if one person is like that from a certain religion…then it must be a religious thing. Which of course is incorrect and leads to these victims either denying their religion or being seen in a negative light. Which is ludicrous.

Another example is if someone has a metal health issue, the same narrow-minded people will think that everyone who suffers with that illness will all follow the same path. Whether its suicide, murder, theft or anything else.

Slight tangent there but the point I’m trying to make is that the world is full of ill-conceived pre-judgements, and it probably always will be. You just have to learn to ignore it and have faith that in time the world may be a better place if we work towards a better future. People need to stop denying religion, denying different sexualities, and stop believing that they are alone in the world, because they aren’t…you aren’t. And in all honesty the internet is the best place to realise that right now, all you have to do is search a problem and thousands of results will come up, proving you’re not alone with whatever problem your having.

Overall don’t listen to anyone else, you are in control of your own life…your own happiness and that is what’s important. If you need support and you go looking for it, you will find it even in the most unlikely places. Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you! Don’t give up you to please everyone else.

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it’s time to pause and reflect.”- Mark Twain

WARNING! New Driver Alert!

I’ve been driving just over a month now, and I’m finally realising that what people said was actually true. You don’t really gain driving experience until after you pass your test. Sure you can know how to drive correctly. Pushing all the right buttons, at the right times. Checking your mirrors for overtaking, or just for people constantly on your ass. But once you’re in a car all by yourself, with no one talking in your ear…then and only then you realise what driving is really like.

I’m going to be honest with you the first month after passing my test was pretty scary. The first hiccup was the car. It’s an old car, with a difficult biting point. One which took the whole first month to actual master to some degree and understand what to do and when to do it. This led to my first embarrassing moment of being stuck on a tiny hill with no way of getting up it (at least no way for a new driver in an old car). I ended up having to reverse back down it after letting three cars go around me. Not the nicest way to ease myself into driving alone.

The second hiccup was lanes on new roads. I tried to push myself as fast as possible as I was already behind a lot of my friends in the ‘art’ of knowing how to drive. So I went onto roads I’d never driven on before in my lessons to get to the closest shopping centre that was near my home. Ahh which leads us onto embarrassing moment number two. Being stuck at the front of a queue trying to change lanes at the last-minute isn’t great. And with the number of annoyed drivers around you, staring at you in a despising way it doesn’t seem to make you feel better either. Luckily no one knew me.

The third hiccup was motorways. Now this has to be the worst thing so far. I mean overall it is just a straight route. The only thing that worries me is that the faster you go, obviously the worse off you be in an accident. Which is why I do my best to do everything right when I’m on a motorway. Abide by the speed limit, keep the right distance from other cars, and take care while changing lanes. But when a massive lorry decides to move over in front of me in the slow lane, after a late indication and leaving around about a 5 inch gap, it makes it a bit harder. And this is my issue. I can do my best to do everything right on a motorway, but I can’t control other people’s actions…and let’s face it…there’s some right idiots out there!

Ahh on the upside, I am loving being able to drive. The freedom, the opportunity, the control. I can go anywhere, whenever I want. So I guess this is the start of my life as a roadtripper…lets see where I end up…